00:13 Tuesday, 24 January 2023
The alt community has long had a close association with the kink community, whether it be the clothes, the radical and disruptive nature of the music and fashion, or the progressive nature of people within the scene. Unfortunately, that openness has been open to abuse; the discussion around Marilyn Manson highlighted some deep-seated issues. As it happens, kink can be a fantastic way to spice up a relationship, and can be transformative. To be accomplished properly, however, there needs to be rules, and an understanding built between everyone involved.
Equipment and testing
Metal, rock, and the alt scene draw a lot from equipment that, from the mid part of the 20th century, became associated and used in the kink scene. As Harper’s Bazaar highlights, items such as the harness are now bona fide fashion pieces, as at home on the catwalk as they are in the bedroom. Equipment is crucial, but it’s important that the good stuff is used in order to facilitate a good environment in the bedroom and ensure everyone stays safe. Synthetic and cotton ropes are better than twine or cord; they’re less abrasive, safer, and easier to clean. The same goes for clothes; high quality leather, synthetic plastics, and similar materials are easily cleaned and safe, as opposed to materials that can pick up bacteria, viruses, and are difficult to clean. Good quality clothing and equipment is essential to BDSM.
A safe environment
Part of the excitement of kink is the pushing of boundaries and, for some, a loss of control. Being tied up is exhilarating, it brings in new sensations, and everyone involved has the opportunity to feel valued and get something out of it. However, there is a crucial principle required to have open communication and a safe environment. As Vice highlights, negotiation and a clear understanding of boundaries is absolutely crucial in establishing that safe environment, and prevents harm. There is by its nature a degree of gray area in kink itself and during intimacy; having a clear agreement beforehand is necessary.
Taking it easy
That safe environment underpins a wider commitment to making kink safe and fun. Where it starts to break down is when other people come into the conversation, especially where they’re not as involved in the discussions leading up to a relationship being built. Again, the mythology and history of rock and metal has often lended itself to hedonistic parties - something reflected in classic hard rock music and the fashion style. While this is enticing, it is so important that conversations are had and boundaries always firmly constructed. Consent is crucial, and feelings are prioritized above all else.
An exciting way to build a relationship and make intimacy more fun, kink brings a new dimension to the bedroom. It’s had a long association with rock and metal, especially in fashion. Having top quality equipment, having good conversations, and taking things slowly is key to staying safe, and staying happy.
